Friday, August 14, 2009

That New Problem monster is a real dick.

So, those of you who are parents will probably understand my dilemma. My husband and I don't always agree on every aspect of parenting, though we have come to compromises on most of the larger things. Then, just when we thing we're safe in our co-parenting bed, the big bad New Problem monster creeps up and scares the shit out of us. Then we have to get out of bed and clean it up. And poo, it sucks. Someday I'm going to make a rug out of that fucker. But I digress.

Yesterday was my husband's one day off (he's a manager at Dairy Queen, salaried, and he works harder than a Chinese kid at a sweatshop most days) and on that day he always keeps our son home with him from daycare to spend much-needed time with him. I think it's fabulous that my husband gets one day off a week and is so dedicated to his family that he'll spend his only day off taking care of his son. One of the many reasons why I love him. :) So he decides to take his little Mini-Me up to visit his dad and sister and her two kids. Yes, his sister lives with his dad, along with her boyfriend and two of her three kids. They live in a trailer court -

Shut up, we lived there with him before we got our own place for a short time. SHUT UP. I am NOT white trash. Ok, maybe I am. Yeah. But I'm not an inbred redneck!

- and they have a front porch that the kids mostly play on, along with the driveway. Her two sons are allowed to leave the yard to play with their friends who live down the Drive from them (they're about 4 trailers from the top road). Husband was inside taking the Browns to the Superbowl, and Sister's boyfriend was watching the boys. He had to take a tinkle break, so he left the kids on the porch with the instruction to stay on the porch. My son is 3 and doesn't spend much time up there. Does anyone else see where this is going?

So after the Browns won, Husband goes out to the porch. Which is, of course, empty. Where does he find our toddler and nephews? Well, our nephews are at the bottom of the Drive playing with their friends. Their friends' parents apparently don't think their kids are important enough to supervise, because they're all outside by themselves. Our nephews are 3 and soon to be 6. Yeah. Now I'm all for trusting your kids, but people come whipping down the streets, and they're not old enough to be wandering a block alone. If they're 7, 8, then by all means. That should be old enough. But 3 and 5? Come on. The court they live in is right off a highway, separated by a sparse semblance of what I'm guessing is supposed to be 'woods'.

He finds our son across the bottom road, heading into the woods. And he feels that this was our son's fault, and that he should have listened when they told him to stay on the porch. Okay, I'll let this sink in. Anyone else find a hole in this logic? His cousins leave the porch, he follows them, no parents are supervising at their friends' house and it's our son's fault? I quickly disillusioned him, so we are comfortably back in the co-parenting bed, but I'd be interested to find out if any of you think that I was wrong.

Meanwhile, I'm going to sit here and enjoy the rest of my Caribou Coffee cooler (similar to a Starbucks Frappuccino, but WAY better) and get some warrant notices sent out. Ah, the joys of being the bearer of good news. It's a half day today, as are all Fridays for summer. Wait, summer is almost over, isn't it? Noooo! I don't want half day Fridays to be over yet. Maybe the boss will decide to keep them. :) Because really, it's far too much fun when he takes us out for a looong lunch and drinks on Fridays. Either way, he's in trial today, so it doesn't matter since he won't be back by the time the office closes at noon.

On an unrelated note, does anyone else feel special when they go to the bathroom at work to find that they're the first person to 'annoint' the freshly cleaned toilet?

My son's newest obsession is watching Husband's season one DVDs of He-Man And The Masters Of The Universe (My husband is an uber-geek). He carries a plastic baseball bat across his back by stuffing it down the neckhole of his shirt, then whipping it out to exclaim, "I He-Man! I have the power!" And then depending on what he feels like that day, Husband and I get to take turns being Skeletor. At least I'm not that creepy plant guy that looked like an asparagus with a ginormous head. Or if he's in the Ice Age mood, he's baby possum, I'm mommy possum and Husband is daddy possum. Last night, He-Man and Skeletor (Husband) were 'fighting' a great battle, and Skeletor took He-Man down with a voracious round of tickle bugs. I'll bet the real Skeletor never thought of tickling He-Man. :)

2 dished:

John S. said...

You are absolutely right. 3 is too young to simply take for granted that he'll stay where he is told to stay. My son is five, very good about listening, and it still makes me nervous that my wife lets him go play in the yard and just kind of watches him out the window. You are 100% right to be concerned/annoyed.

Sassy Pie said...

I think I'd be a bit nervous, too. Thinking about it, the oldest is actually 4 going on 5... Which is even worse now. Because 6 isn't quite so bad. Gah.