Wednesday, September 16, 2009

You'd think it'd be EASY to find fucking acorns in the fall.

So I'm instant messaging with my mom yesterday, and she asks me if I can 'pull a few dozen cupcakes out of my ass' for tomorrow. I get the details from her, and plan a shopping trip to Michael's as I need an M1 frosting tip and a box... At the very least. My mom asks if I could put acorns on the top of said cupcakes. I told her that due to time constraints, I wasn't going to try and make myself go crazy hand-molding teeny tiny acorns out of fondant; but I'd see what I could find at Michael's.

It took us (my aunt and I) half a fucking hour to find something with acorns in Michael's. This is fucking September, people! Acorns are synonymous with things like Halloween and Thanksgiving. WTF? I finally found little acrylic acorns, and here are the results:

Mmm, chocolate cake batter in cupcake liners!

Look at how much prettier cupcakes look when you use the large M1 tip! Mmm, swirly. And don't the acrylic acorns look like they're back lit or something? Absolutely luminous!

Unfortunately in my opinion, they look like hybrid boob-penises up close. But ooh, look! Swirly frosting!

Lonely un-acorned cupcakes... I had six extra, and I really didn't want to put acorns on them. Pretty swirly!

Seriously... Vanilla buttercream and chocolate cupcake. The cupcakes themselves were perfect. I'm such a mega baking goddess.

Now that I've suckled you into my web of sugary food-porn, I have a more serious topic to blog about.

Why is it that once you have a child, people are so eager to come and see you when that child is a newborn (thus unable to crawl/walk/run and get into things) but not once the child gets older? When the Erf-let (son's new nickname as he looks EXACTLY like his father)(Except for my beautiful blue eyes and long eyelashes) got older, the visits dwindled... Not that there were all that many to begin with.

I have a toddler, and people complain that I don't take time out of my schedule to come and visit them. Are you mothercocking kidding me?

Your houses usually aren't child-proofed, and I spend more time running around after him (in some cases) than I do visiting with you. My house is reasonably child-proofed, and I know it's a place I can trust him to run around in and not get into too much trouble. Why is it such a big deal for you to come to me?

And yes, I do go to their houses 95% of the time, so I can complain about this until the cows come home... Or until Kanye interrupts me, either or. (Seriously, that's one of the best websites EVER)

When confronted by one person in particular as to why I hadn't been to their house in a while, I responded with, "Well, it works both ways. You can come to my house, too."

"Oh, no. That's not the way it works." was my response.

So I ask, why not? Why shouldn't it be at least 60/40? When I visit with friends and family, I want to relax. I want to be able to speak for the most part.

It's not that I mind going to other people's houses... I just don't want to always be the visitor. I like playing hostess. I like entertaining people. Most people will tell you that if you come visit me in the evening, I'll feed you. I'm a decent cook and a fabulous baker...

WHY DON'T MORE PEOPLE WANT TO COME SEE ME?!

What do you think, fair Intarwebs? Do you agree that I should be doing more visiting than receiving? Or do you agree that I should be visited at least 40% of the time?

Bah wizzers anyhow.

6 dished:

Mrs Soup said...

You should TOTALLY be visited at least 40% of the time. Especially having a toddler. Only exception would be if they have a newborn. Or 8 kids. Or even 19.

Sassy Pie said...

I totally agree... I didn't mind going to go see people so much when Erf-let was a newborn, because he didn't cause much ruckus and we could leave whenever we wanted to. Mwuahahaha. ;)

Except now I get lonely because it's just the Erflet and I the majority of the time. I don't even have a real internet connection to lose myself in my virtual friendships! Sigh.

Amy said...

I would totally come visit you! What the hell is wrong with people??? Free homecooked meal? I'm in!

Aunt Becky said...

Why are those cupcakes covered with mini-yellow penises?

Aunt Becky said...

And more importantly, why aren't you sending some to me?

Sassy Pie said...

It's mostly family members who apparently think I enjoy toting Erflet everywhere. Yeah, cause that's lots of fun for ME. But it's good to know that I'm not just being a neurotic nut case.

Aunt Becky, they are ACORNS. I'll totally send you an acrylic acorn if you want one that bad. :)

WON'T SOMEONE THINK OF AUNT BECKY??!!!?11?